tattoo empek empek

A few hours ago I lay by the sea in the archipelago and watched the others - my parents, sisters, their boyfriends, Eddi, his children and the dogs - play games but I just listened to the wind and the sound of water against the rocks.

You have no idea how many posts of mine remain unpublished.
I have megabytes after megabytes of photos that were meant for posts that I never have had the time to post about. Something else came up instead, I wasn't able to produce text or could choose pictures, others just lingered on my to-blog list until they felt out-of date (like, say, photos from my trip to Oslo january 2010...).

This was for a post about lashes at a time I was still blonde.


And this one about nails.


The point here was the blue hair flower and the fact that I wore blue shoes.

And lots of other things and happenings and themes...







But Goddamit! I have at least two hundred (some relatively crappy and some less crappy) pictures of baby lambs - lambs that already are sort of big by now and out on the fields for the rest of the summer - but there is so going to be a lamb post still, at some point!



(I also have about twice as many pictures of ice and snow and stuff in the habour so there will be such a post too, weather anyone really wants to see it or not.)

Marked "Hellsinky September '99"
The pictures of me, a little before i turned 18, and my friend Izu in the park were taken by some Italian guy who stopped and asked us if he could snap some photos. He later sent them to me. He also sent me a picture of him on a vespa but that one I no longer have.


Look at all that hair of mine... I still have that 60's dress. Only somethign tells me I will not fit in to it anymore.


A couple of my best friends at the time, Izu and Maria. Izu is now an artist living in Berlin and Maria is the mother of a first grader. I developed the photo myself and accidentally flipped it, as you can see the text is wrong.


In France one summer before. I was there some weeks on a French course. Check out those sandals...!


Hippie shot of Maria.


Well this one you have seen before, earlier. I recently bumped in to a girl that had been a few grades under me, and had sung in the same school choir. She recognized me and said "you had a thing for butterflies back then". Well, um, yes, I guess I did.

The knitted sweater is my grandmother's from the fifties, the rest is old, new stuff. Or how would one put it; new-old, old-new. Hmm. Later in the Easter weekend it got so warm one could stay out with short sleeves on. Finally!

I feel there's been an awful lot of pictures of me here on this blog lately. You know sometimes when blogging this 'what-the-hell-am-I-doing-just-posting-pictures-of-myself-here-all-the-time'-feeling comes over you. Another case of the 'blogsistential crisis' perhaps. But I do remember this little poll I had last autumn where it turned out that in the end outfit posts were the most required. Le sigh. And from time to time there has been very little of those too. I blog in cycles I guess.

Umm, well yes, anyway, if you just can't get enough I suggest you like The Freelancer's Fashion Blog on Facebook too. In the beginning I had no exact idea why I started that page, I just thought it'd be smart at some point or something like that. But it perhaps turned out a less official version of the blog, more face to face interaction. (I mean, as face to face as you can go in the virtual world...) It's also been rather useful. And it is quite fun!

Anyway, now's the time to like it if you will - this blog is reaching 2,000 followers trough Blogger soon and the Facebook page is slowly but certainly climbing up to 1,000 likes. I'm putting togheter something nice for all of you when 2000+1000 happens!

(Btw I also think I look like a squirrel in the first picture but I posted it anyway.)

But yes, ahum, there's been a lot of that lately.

No spring vibes here no!
Welcome to the black-blog where you can get inspiration on how to wear basically the same tuff in similar ways!

No, but seriously, lately I've done a lot of proving ones point regarding black ensembles as the easiest to go for when doing long days and in a hurry -I'm really waiting for some time off... I just always seem to get involved in or take on new projects after one is finished. And most of them are fun or interesting to do. But I should learn to take it easy too!

Here are some of the things I've done and will do lately, packing my bag the night before and leaving home at 05.40 in the morning for work: Thursday - to the studio for the PS show after work and home in the evening. Friday - did a burlesque themed shoot right after work (in the harbour! It got a bit cold after a while :) And this weekend I'll spend 25hours in the harbour as usual (that's the way it goes when on weekend duty, every third week) and on Monday I'll go straight from work to the Casino where we have an evening show. And on Tuesday I need to go to the accountant to get last year's declarations signed and then on to a shoot and then a meeting.

But you know what? I seem to have Wednesday and Friday free (although I'm sure I will come up with something..) so I can actually go to the gym and finally tidy up at home! Droool.

(Oh, I almost forgot as somebody will ask anyway: skirt by Olivia Rouge, shoes Melissa, top from H&M just a few weeks ago so yes they probably still have them :), belt by Vivien of Holloway. The bag & beret are vintage.)

Things I did yesterday: booked tattoo time (to May, the boys over at Legacy are popular…), bought a thick interior magazine and enjoyed it alone with sushi, edamame and a beer (sometimes dining seul is just the best thing), went to the ballet with Tinker and Aino, wore black and had before all of this spent a long time wet set waving & drying my hair only to notice the nice waves go rather straight very fast due to the moist air..

Going to the ballet was beautiful - I haven't seen a ballet in years. A long time ago I sang some seasons in the choir at the National Opera for the Nutcracker ballet. We got a personnel discount and I went to see the ballets running at that time. Anyway, tanding on the side of the stage in the choir I was surprised to hear how the weightless appearing dancers actually sound rather heavy when they hit the floor after the jumps and how the male dancers sighed of exhaustion when lifting the ballerinas. And also, how sweaty they got.

This time we went to see Manon. It had some very beautiful scenes and the costumes and setting for some of them were superb, the bordello scene for example. Which I unfortunately don't have any pictures of. But it was a lot of pastel tulle there I tell you.

I suppose one reason for us finally managing to see a ballet was the Black Swan - there has been more talk about ballet lately due to that movie. I've seen the film and wasn't blown away, but started liking it a little more the next day and thought about the film for a while, which I guess is a sign of good cinema in a certain way. What I did like right away however was the set of posters LaBoca made for the film:

(Three of them shown here. I left out the one I didn't like that much. click for a bigger view.)

I like film posters made the old school way, drawn, like Fairey's Walk the Line. I have a look at Polish Posters every now and then. But what annoys me a little bit here (listen to the expert talking here now) is the ballerina in the poster the most to the right... there's something about that silhouette that just bugs my eye but I suppose I can live with that.

Well, back to me. Black always works if having to do stuff during a day that will end up more fancy at, for example, the Opera. Well as you know I think black works pretty much at whatever, whenever. My top is from H&M - I really like the cut - it's rather early fifties. Just as the striped top this one has a big zipper halfway down from the neck that I'm thinking of removing and changing to a button and loop instead. Zippers are apparently trendy now.

(And yes, you saw correctly, trousers!)

(Photo from last Saturday's Burlesque Festival -I'm a really fierce snake as you see- by Adam Monaghan)

I've been blog awarded/nominated by a lot of nice bloggers during autumn and winter (thank you all), often with the list-seven-things-of-yourself included.I don't blog about the awards on but here are some seven:

-I'm addicted to checking my email.

-My parents used to, among other nicknames, call me Iggi Påpp (you know, like Iggy) when I was smaller. And sometimes still.

-I shared a flat with a rocket scientist one summer.

-I get addicted to certain foods for a certain period at the time. Right now; soured milk with blueberries and Caesar salad. I have to eat those five time a week, at least.

-As you may know I have a degree in graphic design and media but I have no intention of working at any agency or studio. To be honest, sometimes I have no ida what my intentions are, work wise.

-I used to hate my behind and there were times when I could not dance in the middle of the dance floor, always the back to the wall. And now I perform and shake that thaeng in front of hundreds of people. Things change.

-I've worked in the harbor for more than ten years. Gone for longer and shorter periods every now and then, but still; a little more than a third of my life.

Seven older ones, from the time I was addicted to berrie pudding and that Happy Cow millshake (I keep on forgetting the name and thinking of it as Mad Cow Milkshake or Crazy Cow but 'm pretty sure that's not the right ones :) can be found here. (I hate the photo of me in that post btw. And if I would be one of those to use internet acronyms I'd add LOL here, but I'm not; I don't. Although I kind of just did).


.

I've never been much for New Year's promises. I mean, come on.
But, I have however tried it with improvements. Improvements of things I've noticed I don't handle in the most ideal way in daily life. I've however tried improving the same things two years in a row and both times it has gone horribly wrong; I'm even worse than before...

This year I'm going to try and read more.
I have a small pile of books on my bedside table that has been there forever. I should just leave the damn computer and internet alone (sorry guys...)!


I have heaps of books waiting for me as I keep on buying them in a different pace than I actually read them. Goddamit! I also put loads of books on my shelf when packing down my grandparents hundreds of books in boxes for storage in the basement. So many pages, so many words and letters, so little time...


Another thing to improve is the one that I've failed the past years: organize my papers better, instead of giving the pile a go only once a month (if even that). Oh my I am so terribly bad at that, and believe me - I have lots of papers; the regular ones all household gather, my own companies and then the Itty Bitty's company matters. I'd need an assistans (who will work for free and still not screw me over). That improvement would also result in a much more nicer study one could actually spend time in, ahem.


Last but not least I should try to stick to another thing I wanted to start last year already (but did not manage to do, mostly thanks to Teh Internet...); a moment of self pampering each night! Now, you may think that I'd actually do that all the time, yes, in some matters,daily basic stuff like toothbrushing and hair brushing of course (and the occasional cabbage-do :) - but in the end not that much. I was thinking things like a foot bath, some stretching, a scrub, a calm moment. Something small just a few minutes per evening. Lat year I planned that I'd put fifteen minutes on papers and tidying up per night, and fifteen minutes to myself with something nice.
Well, didn't work out.

Let's see if I'll be better (to myself actually) this year then!

Last week I wrote about what I wear around the house or on days that I am not particularly "going anywhere". My knitted and stretchy skirt and dresses yes, but there is an even more comfy version that I often do when going to work or going out to the countryside. More practical, but still nice;I like to layer a lot of whatever nice and soft, those items that I have but not get to wear too much otherwise.

Mostly comfy tops or thermals, my print tees and shirts, stockings, a lot of socks and leg warmers, the more the better, a bit boho but even more hobo (you know, in a good way :)

The colder it gets, the more I just layer, my favourite for the time being the a pair of funny black puffy knee-lengh trousers that combined with grey knitted knee socks, my vintage collar knit and old work wear boots (I have a bunch of those as I get new ones every year in the harbour) make me look like it's the thirties and I'm gong skiing (that some of you on my facebook page wondered about yesterday).

But mostly it's just a long cardi, tights and a pair of ridiculously small shorts (as I never get to wear such around town).

Everything in the pictures is old, except for my motorcycle print shirt which is new from Morgan's & Philips.

This Saturday two years ago exactly our first big burlesque-related interview was published in Volt magazine.



And our then so active music quiz team had a so called "Little Chirstmas party" and we all happened to be dressed in red ad black. Our taxi driver into town called me Marilyn Monroe.

Later that same night it started snowing, first snow of the year, and it snowed a lot. I was strutting around in my small red patent heels in all the wet white.

And that was also the night that I met my Eddi.

I've been admiring the bright and rich colours this fall somehow feeling there is more of those than last year and then realized, a bit surprised, it is due to the fact that it has not been that windy lately -it has allowed the trees to maintain their colours in full glory. It's normally windy as hell around here this time of year and today we're back to normal; the wind is hard and the air full of twirlling yellow leaves. I've gone to pick up some Nepalses and mango lassi now in between the ships and am waiting to go out and face the wind and the growing waves.

This Sunday may not be a soft one, but one with work (I'd like to say hard work but Sundays are pretty easy so I'd be exaggerating) and cold, but here's some music to go along anyway:

And also, last but not least; as you may know the blog and I are aging gracefully together; I started my thirtieth year last week and the blog will now enter it's fourth (!) one. It's always funny to look back and see how some things m,ong many others have changed,; during the first year of blogging for example my work changed from freelancing with a lot of things to cutting down and mainly working in the habrour. During the second year burlesque went from becoming an interest to something I started doing for real, and the past year for me has been about changes; I moved away from the centre of town to greener areas and how two kids around the house every second week. Let's see what I can wrap up next year then!

In late 2006 the company I worked for merged with another one and I started working in a new harbour. Our work teams split up and all routines and systems were new. It was cold and dark late November and we supervised a freight ship that took hours to load, sometimes having to stay at work until two in the night. I was waiting for my winter gear to arrive and froze in my short workwear jacket and rather tight pants (asa they are designed for men there's not a lot of space for the trunk-junk) and hated the fact that the stevedores were checking out my derrière. One of my old colleagues had made a mix CD that we kept in our work van and listened to trough the night. I hated that period and I missed my old work mates.

This song was on the CD and every time I hear it it makes me think of cold those dark nights in the harbour, the cold wind, rusty ship and the big waves splashing up on berth. And now I almost miss that!

I though I'd write a little about those clog sandals of mine (conveniently now that summer is coming to an end and it's getting colder - well, at least it's still warm in some parts of the world. And ok, it's still sandal-weather here too. Over and out.) as some of you asked me about weather the hasbeens really were comfy or not and how their sizing was. So here's yet another shoe story for you:

As you know, after a lot of talk around town (the internet that is) and hype about what sounded to be the comfiest shoes ever (for this season at least) I was going though a tiny struggle on weather to put or not to put over 200 euros on a pair of clogs. I have had clogs as a kid, those more traditional ones, and clogs are no new pehnomenon for the 00's either - Carrie wore a pair of Hanna Sarén clogs in SATC years ago and FINSK has been all about wooden soles for years too. But now I could not get the thought of soft wood under my feet (or smooth actually, wood is pretty hard) out of my head. And, I was still on that endless quest to find the pair (or, at least a pair) of comfy and high heeled shoes to be able to wear all trough summer. I got a lot of tips from lovely people around the world (well, mostly Sweden since they know their clogs) about other, less pricey brands (than Hasbeens). And I did see a lot of cute clogs out there (again, internet) but none of them were as pretty or as high as the damn sky highs.

Then, on a hot humid July day with aching feet I stumbled across a pair of Moheda clogs (at Indiska) for a third of the price and decided to try them on and Oh! Feet orgasm!
So I bought them, altough not that high and thus not for the same purpose the sky highs would have served. But every woman needs a pair of less fancy sandals for when she goes to the countryside you see! Then one hot evening (you know, those hot humid Helsinki nights we have grew accustomed to...first time I was able to say that, ever!) when I was about to hit town with a big flowing skirt and with flowers in my hair I was reaching for my high heels those clogs in the corner started going all "tum tu dum", whisteling and looking up the ceiling. I tried not to notice them and squeezed a foot in the high heeled shoe. Clogs still all 'tum tu dum dum' in the corner of my eye and goddamit, the walk to the bus (yes! the bus nowadays!) and the strolling around town flashed before my eyes and I couldn't resist anylonger - I had to leave the pretty shoes behind and go for the comfy (and ok, rather cute) clogs.
That was the sign for me; nothing else left to do anymore, I was now allowed to order myself The Hasbeens.

One or two days after the UPS boy stood behind my door and there they were, all bubblegum coloured and new. After two days of walking them in and a little olive oil they were soft enough not to make my feet blister (and almost bleed) anymore. So I thought it to be a good deal although the price, as I did wear them quite a lot during summer. (It might be a bit alarming that I considering something worn a lot if I've had it on me five times or so per season but hey, that's today's world I guess - and I did wear the sky highs pretty much actually).

My clogged feet.

So, my real point here and to answer your questions however was that yes, they are comfy and go for the smaller size if you're in between. And watch out the pastel leather gets dirty easily.

First I'm going to tell you something and then I'm going to ask you something.

The telling: I'm completely fucked in the head.

To start with I blame the internet, my paypal account and then a bunch of other facts, phenomenons and whatever. The thing is, I just can't stop wanting stuff, not only believing but knowing I need it/that/those/whatever, trying to make my wardrobe complete; perfect for any occasion. You know, one part of life such as it is seen upon nowadays is a constant search for the perfect something - the perfect job, the perfect home, the perfect partner, the perfect hand bag, perfect black skirt, foundation, mascara, every day shoes, life you name it... The longing for all things perfect and then even a little more prefect is something of a challenge we create upon ourselves but also something being fed to us all the time in magazines and commercials.

Well, enough about blaming society for my materialistic cravings as the thing here was about me and my f:d up head, plus, for the moment I actually have the perfect home-in-the-making and a pretty perfect partner (plus perfect lashes done so skip the mascara and I've given up on the black skirt). But, as it seems, not the perfect easy going shoes for summer. As that is clearly something everyone needs. And one fine day when I should have been out in the park enjoying the sunshine but instead sat down by the wonderful never-ending world of the internet I found the perfect ones:

Swedish Hasbeens candy coloured sky high sandals. That at least in my book look comfy enough for the so called every day wear.

But but but. I have a whole box of -yet-to -unpack-and-nowhere-to-put-after-that-shoes (not sandals though! Very few such!) at home. (Not to mention clothes, still a couple of suitcases in waiting. And strangely though, I think I have less and less to wear day by day. How can it be?)

Well anyway, I may be fucked in the head but the sandals are still pretty sweet aren't they? And one pair more wouldn't hurt. Plus my comfy everyday summer shoes so far have been a pair of red H&M peeptoes, well serving their 19 euros since 2006, now falling apart. I mean, these even come in mint green! (Even though I do think one pair of mint green shoes are enough, believe it or not. Might go for pink or natural-shaded ones instead).


Hmmm.

So, now over to the questions: since the apparently much hyped Swedish Hasbeens still are a little bit on the more expensive side I'd really like to know if they are comfortable. That would pretty much be the whoel point of purchasing. I sort of think that if you pay more than 150 euros for a pair of shoes comfot better come with the price - that works for Minna Parikka shoes at least, but you can never be sure.(And no, lower heels are out of the question. I don't think the sky high ones look that high anyway.)
So any experiences on the sky high ones?
Or hasbeens in general?

And does anybody know about the sizing? I read they are rather small but their size chart seems to be pretty regular, almost bit on the bigger side. I've been measuring my feet over and over here at work, even standing on a ruler and the result indicates I should go for a 36 but that would be one size smaller than my normal one and I can't really trust that.

Well over and out, let's see if I end up with a pair or if I find something else more necessary and interesting before I click Buy.

...as much as I would love to blog about all the things that come into my mind I never quite make it, many are the posts that remain just a sentence on some paper somewhere or as a note on one a stickie of mine (great application if you ask me). There's also a whole lot of great blogs out there too that I quite can't keep up with. Too many blogs, too little time, but what can you do when you have a hectic lifestyle (and sometimes even leave the internet, heh).

Every now and then you all suggest I should follow your bogs but I don't, that would be too many, although I check in on a lot of you every now and then, mostly trough comments. I only follow the first one I ever stumbled upon in the beginning of the internet (well, not quite the beginning, but beginning of blogging; when blogging was rather new over here :) -which I can't stand anymore but can't keep away from either- and some of my friend's, like Ina and Fiona. (Rather unlogic perhaps, since I know what they are up to anyway :)

But anyway, I had a few points here*; one; in between posts I blabber about a lot of unimportant and important stuff over at The Freelancer's Fashion Blog's Facebook page , a little less on Twitter and answer whatever, almost, you ask on Formspring. And two; I only add people I know on my personal facebook, however, sometimes readers of mine add me too. And I can't really say no then :) But you really really have to send me a message to go with the add, otherwise I don't know who you are, or why you add me, ok?

Could you have imagined reading the past sentences ten years ago? You would have no idea what the F I'm babbling about.
That's a bit funny. There weren't even camera phones back then I think.

*) shameless purpousless marketing of self, obviously.

Yesterday I took the bus (only 15 minutes during rush hour, very important for me to point that out now that I'll be moving away from the inner city. It's the bus-thing you know.) and got off at my stop-to-be, surrounded by it's white flowers.


Bugs are cute in natrue, where they belong. (As in Not in the house!)
The way down to the new home. You'd never believe one of the most heavily trafficked high ways in Finland runs just around the corner. Our building is behind the trees, in front of the large meadow. The sea is to the right.
I pretty much grew up around here you know.


I sat down on the meadow for a while...
...and then I lay down before going in and renovating my behind off me the rest of the day. Ah, summer!


Oh yeah, and I almost forgot the mention : I got my green shoes!


...

(Well,
I guess I can squeeze in a couple of more pictures of the shoes and a quickie on how I actually got them:
So here's the story : Stupid girl who should think about everything else than shoes feels she has to get the green pumps and emails stupid Vagabond Finland who say these shoes were never brought in to the country (since stupid Finns can't appreciate the good stuff she interprets). She then emails evil Vagabond Europe who say the shoes will never ever be on the online store in size 37 ever again. Persistant shoe-girl does not give up but tracks them down at nice German shop who happen to carry them but not in size 37. Nice German shop has a wish list and silly shoe girl clicks it and receives an email one week later that the shoes are now in stock (lying evil Vagabond)! Nasty German shop does not ship to Finland not even though hopeful shoe girls emails them in very polite German and kindly asks. Obsessed shoe girl does not give up but get's a little help from wonderful Frollein in Berlin who orders the shoes herself and then sends them to mint-green-obsessed-shoe-girl in Finland. Oh, the wonders of the internet, now they are on her feet!End of story.)

So, back to the meadow. At the and of the day, very tired and very dirty after hours of work, I took the bus home (8 minutes downtown).