G.R.I.T. - I Am One and Damn Proud Of It :)
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Thank you so much to the person who e-mailed me this and gave me a nice chuckle for the day. Kiss me - I'm a GRIT!
"GRIT (Girls Raised In Texas ): Texas Women, Kittens and Biscuits
Someone once noted that a Texan can get away with the most awful kind of insult just as long as it's prefaced with the words, "Bless her/his heart", “God love her”, “Poor little thang”, “Guess she don’t know better…but”
For example, " Bless her heart, if they put her brain on the head of a pin, it'd roll around like a BB on a 6-lane highway." Or, “Poor little thang, if brains were gasoline, he wouldn’t have enough to drive a piss ant around the hole of a life saver.”
I was thinking about this the other day when a friend was telling about her new transplanted northern friend who was upset because her toddler is just beginning to talk and he has a Texas accent. My friend, who is very kind and, God love her, cannot do a thing about those thighs of hers, was un-justifiably miffed about this. After all, this woman had CHOSEN to move to Texas a couple of years ago. "Can you believe it?" said her friend, "A child of mine is going to be "taaaallllkkin liiiike thiiiissss."
Now, don't get me wrong. Some of my dearest friends are from the North, bless their hearts. I welcome their perspective, their friendships, and their recipes for authentic Northern Italian food. I've even gotten past their endless complaints that you can't find good bread down here. And the heathens, (they can’t help it, guess they don’t know any better), don't like cornbread!
I have a friend from Bawston, bless her heart, who thinks it's hilarious when I say I've got to "carry" my daughter to the doctor or "cut off" the light. She also gets a giggle every time I am "fixin" to do something. And, God love them, they don't even know where "over yonder" is or what "I reckon" means!
My personal favorite was my aunt, saying, " Bless her little pea-pickin’ heart, she cain't help being ugly, but she could'uh stayed home."
Texas girls know bad manners when they see them:
1. Drinking straight out of a can.
2. Not sending thank you notes.
3. Velvet after February.
4. White shoes before Memorial Day or after Labor Day.
Texas girls always say:
1. "Yes Maam."
2. "Yessir."
Texas girls have a distinct way with fond expressions:
1. "Yawl come back."
2. "Well, bless yer harrt."
3. "Drop by when ya can."
4. "How's yer mama?"
5. "Love yer hair."
Texas girls know their three R's:
1. Rich
2. Richer
3. Richest
Texas girls know everybody's first name:
1. Hunny
2. Darlin'
3. Shuger
Texas girls know the movies that speak to their hearts:
1. "Gone With the Wind"
2. "Fried Green Tomatoes"
3. "Driving Miss Daisy"
4. "Steel Magnolias"
Texas girls know the three deadly sins:
1. Bad hair
2. Bad manners
3. Bad blind dates
G.R.I.T. = Girls Raised in Texas!
Now you run along, Shuger, and tell this to ANY females aspiring to be GRITS--Even the northern ones, "Bless Their Hearts, God Love 'Em"
"Just because you move to Texas does not make you a Texan. After all, if a cat had kittens and moved them to the oven, that wouldn't make them biscuits." "
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